Reply To: Tamworth

[Friendly Lamb]

Good morning Scunthorpe, from sunny, sunny Tamworth, the home of an ancient Norman castle, and our iconic heritage site, the Snow Dome!
Please allow me, I come not to gloat or crow despite our five point advantage this morning. On the contrary, I bring goodwill, chocolates and flowers from south east Staffs.
I have to say, I am stunned by the air of negativity on your website. It seems a bit premature for some of you men of Iron to be waving your white handkerchiefs so early in proceedings.
How quickly the landscape can change at the top. After all, most humble Tamworth fans believe we are merely keeping the top seat warm for you. We expect nothing less than a battle to the death on April 20 – and that’s what I am sure we will get.
But when all is said and done, surely the massive disparity in our two clubs relating to history, tradition, player-budget, spending power, full-time, fan-base and your wonderful ground, which we are so looking forward to visiting, will tilt the balance in your favour.
However, despite all this bonhomie, I do have to take umbrage with one of your posters, MK Iron, who claims Tamworth are neither clever, pretty or entertaining.
Let me address these three points individually.
1. Clever. I am not privy to any Ofsted reports but I can only suggest that the GCSE success rate at English and Mathematics is at least on a par in Tamworth’s secondary schools with those in Scunthorpe.
2. Pretty. Now granted I am no oil painting and a few of my fellow supporters can hardly claim to be Brad Pitt either. Indeed a couple of our players are in urgent need of a hair transplant – but by no means do we play ugly football.
3. Entertaining. Again I have to concede we have a paucity of great entertainers who hail from Tamworth, though we do claim Del Trotter to be one of our own because of his love affair with a three-wheeled Reliant Robin which was built in Tamworth many moons ago.
But on a slightly serious note, I spoke to a few Warrington supporters last night on leaving the ground who said Tamworth were the best team they had seen at their ground in years. They had been well and truly entertained by little old Tamworth.
So, keep your chins up lads and we look forward to crossing swords with you a week on Saturday. Will Kevin Keegan be at the game? Our most famous footballing son. Paul Merson. has promised to come along to support us providing he can get out out of Soccer Saturday.
And hopefully I will get the opportunity to say hello to a few of you pre-game in the Honest Lawyer, while drinking a pint of your finest Lincolnshire ale. You will easily recognise me, remember, I’m ugly and I will be carrying a box of Thorntons and a bouquet or red roses.
Friendly Lamb.