I have it on good authority from poor mans Damien Lewis lookalike Bax Mell that
apparently the box’s (and it comes from a good sauce within the club) contained various models of Ernest Pawn so that he can be in the Directors Lounge at home games.
One version was an avatar which unfortunately gave Ernest a blue tinge which could not be scrubbed off, also with Ernest being a tad rotund the Avatar tail had a tendency to pop out the back of an old suit from one of Blackpool’s finest tailors Primarni.
Another version was a blow up type which made Ernest look like he had been purchased from a sex shop, it did not help that the club ordered the realistic version with several open orifices that could be used, further problems were noticed in that the arms were in such a position that it made him look like he wished to dance with everyone.
Another trial was in 12 mm ply-board which although very realistic did not look good in a suit.
The chosen version was a cardboard cut-out which unfortunately for Ernest was assembled wrong, the bottom half of Karin’s cardboard cut-out was attached to the top half of Ernest leaving said cut-out not only looking like a #### but talking like one as well.
The person responsible thought to be the ginger girl in the ticket office has now been signed to play up front with our other striker who cant be revealed because he is launching the new kit which should be in the shops for Easter.
